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With their rules, values, and prohibitions, each family has its own functioning. Their methods of struggle with difficulties, their reactions in times of crisis, their sadness, their happiness and ways of living can be quite different from each other. In some families, while the relationship between children and their parents is quite distant, in some families the parents try to be the best friends of their children, and in some families, mothers act as a bridge between the father and the children. ELELE Child and Family Psychological Counseling Development and Education Center Specialist Psychological Counselor ASLI BOZBEY AKALIN, Evlilik The foundation of the family starts with marriage. With the desire to unite the lives of two people, a marriage decision is made. This decision is the first stage of a new beginning. Together with this decision, not only those two people, but also their values, their dreams, their order of living, and most importantly their loved ones and their families are now part of this unification. Therefore, there is a delicate balance. For a healthy partnership, it is necessary to endeavor to produce solutions that can make both sides happy without sacrificing personalities. First of all, individuals are no longer "WE" It is important that he can start to think. Çift We're trying to get pregnant, in says American couples.
How we separated from our families while building a new life is also very important. Weddings should be seen as a ceremony of farewell. With this ceremony, we are now aware that we have established our own family life. Aslı Akalın continues: şeffaf A transparent border enters between us and our family. However, this limit should be capable of being stretched when necessary. It is important for families to make them feel that they respect the decisions and lives of newlyweds, but are in a position where they can easily get help when they need it. Otherwise, resentment, anger and restlessness are inevitable to be carried to the couple's life. As much as being intimate with families; long-distance, distant and cold relationships are also not healthy. Restricting or not meeting the spouse's family, or going to dinner every evening, making holiday programs together, makes it difficult for the couple to get used to their new arrangements and start a life together. ”
Newlyweds are setting their own rules and values by blending manners, education and beliefs from their families. Later on, they were promoted from a couple to a family life with a baby joining them. As the family expands, dynamics, roles and, accordingly, some rules begin to change. Spouses now also have parental responsibilities. Psychologist Akalın, Olmak Being a parent is not about being relieved of your life partner duty. ” sonra Even after the family has expanded, spouses need to look out for opportunities that can be left alone. Enjoyable times and exchanges spent together; love, tranquility, happiness is the first condition of a family environment, and therefore to raise happy children. The above-mentioned transparent boundary should also be in relation to children. To forget that we are a parent from time to time in an effort to be democratic, to do everything in the name of making our child happy, to index our lives to him after a while may cause the balance in the parent / child relationship to deteriorate. Remember that your child needs a model that he trusts and believes more than a friend. On the other hand, being with the child is not healthy both for the child's development and for the parent. A self-controlled child who spends almost all of his time with parents cannot develop self-confidence. Parents, too, may become unhappy after a while, as they devote all their time to their children and schedule them. At this point, it is important to remember that spending quality time with children is more important. Therefore, parents should not deprive themselves of the activities they enjoy. They should take care to create time and opportunity to participate in such activities both as a couple and as an individual. A peaceful and happy mother / father is one step closer to healthy communication with her child. Let's not forget; happiness and tension are contagious. Let's try to bring peace to our home as much as possible. ”
ELELE Child and Family Counseling Development and Education Center
(0212) 223 91 07